Yes, I’m beautiful in the mornings, I know. 
Time & Confusion February 27, 2007
Good morning.
So it seems the only time I ever make posts is in the middle of the night. Lol. This post is no exception. I’m up studying for midterms (and taking nice long breaks). I really hate having two math classes to study for, but at least this time the midterms are on different days.
These last few weeks have been pretty great. I finally went in to Torrey Pines and got to sit in on Mr. Williams’ lecture…er, class. Lol. It was awesome. If there’s anyone to learn from, it’s gotta be him. I love that he can joke around with his class yet still have their respect, not only toward him, but also toward the material he’s teaching. Maybe I only noticed the over-achieving kids, but everyone in there seemed to be working so hard and really wanting to learn. Lol. Very different from when I was in his class. I’m an awful student. Haha.
For good news though, he told me that he’s head of the math department at TP and that he’s a part of the interviewing board for new teachers. 
How awesome is that?! Oh, and to make life even better, he said he’d write me a letter of rec. So i guess staying in SD for college wasn’t such a bad choice (although sometimes I do wish I left).
My sleeping schedule has been really messed up. If it weren’t for the seven (haha, yes, seven) cups of coffee I’ve had, I’d probably be near dead right now. Instead, I’m nice and jittery. Lol. There are days where I’m up late and then sleeping in until I have to wake up to tutor…or worse, staying up late and then getting up early to tackle the day.
Ahh. I should update on tutoring. Lol. Well, currently, I’m putting in 6 hours a week tutoring ppl. Not too bad except that those 6 hours are really more like 10 since I do so much work for tutoring outside of those hours. I’m pretty sure I’ve said this before, but it’s really frustrating (more so now since I have more things I need to do for myself) when I put in the effort to teach these kids and they’re not putting in the effort to learn. I’m sure my teaching style (or lack thereof?) has a lot to do with their apathy toward my being there. Anyway, after this quarter of having an UD math class and still holding my job and such, I’ve realized that I don’t have that much time to put into tutoring. The time I put into tutoring could be spent studying or napping after a long day. Hence (ugh, such a math word), I’ve decided to stop tutoring writing next quarter. That cuts my students in half. I’m 75% sure I won’t tutor at all next year. I’ve gotten the experience I want out of it, and unless the student approaches me begging and wanting my help, I think I’m bowing out of the tutoring world. I know it’s selfish of me, but my grades and body shouldn’t have to take the blow. Looking back though, no regrets. Tutoring has been rewarding and challenging. Despite all my complaining about it, I do like it a lot and would definitely start it up again when I’m no longer a student.
Jon and I are approaching our 9 month mark. God…that seems like such a long time, yet it’s gone by so quickly. Anyway, to celebrate, we’re both taking midterms that day. Lol. We are going to Disneyland on Saturday though. More of as an escape from school than a celebration, but “a rose by any other name smells just as sweet.” Haha. Sorry. I like that quote (or quotation if you’re Andy reading this. lol. just kidding) and I used to use it all the time, but it hasn’t crossed my mind in years. I popped up when I was trying to finish the sentence so I threw it down there. Hope it makes sense…kind of. Ahh. Anyway, Jon and I are also going to the Anberlin concert next Friday. Yay. That should be awesome.
Ok. Well, this spat of my thoughts has been fun…and as you can see, the coffee has my mind going in a million places at once which is probably why I can’t focus on math. Or perhaps, it’s simply cuz math sucks. Oh yes, I forgot to say that I’ve developed this new, passionate, deep, deep hate for math. It’s gotten ridiculously frustrating and impossible. My brain is not cut out for this kind of though. Whenever I hit a road block (in anything really), I like to blame it on the fact that I’m still an adolescent and thus embracing my state of pseudostupidity.
It’s quite an interesting concept really. See, adolescents go through quite a bit of cognitive development in a relatively short span of time. When they first acquire new ways of thinking and their “new brain,” most of adolescents aren’t used to thinking on such high levels and so don’t know how to use their “new brain.” Because of this, they tend to overlook the solution which may be right in front of them because they’re lacking experience with their new abilities. So yes, I’m pseudostupid. I make poor decision and overlook obvious solutions. I don’t know better. Ahh, the excuses we love to make for ourselves.
Ok. Now, for real, good night.
Never Take Friendship Personal February 9, 2007
Crap. It’s 5 AM and I’m not tired. 
I have two midterms tomorrow so it’s gonna be a long day…yet I’m awake. I’m here out of boredom. I have nothing to do alone here in the dark.
Jon brought me flowers the other day when I was sad. They were absolutely perfect. He had it customized so it had my favorite flowers. It was the sweetest thing ever. Thanks again.
I have nothing to update on. Good night.
We’re So Far Away February 1, 2007
I love when I’m walking on campus and I see guys carrying a single flower that they bought at that flower stand in PC. I think it’s the most adorable thing. Lol. It makes my day each time. Except when I saw it today, it kind of got ruined by my awful midterm.
For good news though, the 20F midterm went well.
